I went to see Somerfield and ended up bawling my eyes out on the way over.
Now's not much better. I had to go downstairs a little while ago and cried into my pillow like a child.
It comes down to guilt over leaving. I didn't expect this process to have such an emotional aspect, but I've been surprised how much it means to make this kind of leap. It seems like desertion, in a way. All of the things that will happen here in the future, I'll be a distant witness at best.
I'm reminded of Devin's Dad's funeral, the last time I cried like this.
It's the same feeling of helplessness and distance from one's friends. There's nothing you can say to someone that's gone, and you're stuck thinking about things you should have said.
I love all of you so much.